A Song i wrote about my Life

[Modern]

I Hope some of you enjoy my song.
Please leave me a reply if you like it or not,
thank you.







drowning in sorrow, something i'll never get over,
Love is a lie, leaves you asking questions why?
About your life, you end up hurt, the end is suicide.
If the cycle never ends, i'll just start pretending that this will have a happy ending.
I Had it up to here, the amount of spilled tears in the atmosphere, make me wish to god you were here.
Love, love is too late.
The one, the one you hate,
will become, will become a regular,
your heart, your heart will be broken forever.

(chourus)----vvvvv

You or the world can't save me,
no hope for love or humanity,
the memories will fade, as i accumulate rage.
The past is the past, today is today,
Hold on to the one you love, cause you could end up like me,
a broken soul, who lost controll over everything and everyone he ever known..
I'm tired, broken down, and alone... This is the story of my life..


(Verse2)---vvvvvv

I Wish i could go back to the old me,
i wouldn't have to worry about what i could be,
i had some self respect back then, but i've been raped and tortured and been through hell and back again..
No one bothers to ask why i hate myself, and dwell on the rest, it's easy to see if you were just like me,
only one person understands me, everyone else cares too much about they're self prioraty's,
i'm suprised i have not hurt myself, i seem to be doing a good job to everybody else,
i wish i could leave my life upon a shelf, and be done with the drama and everything else,
but no one else seems to care, my family just sits and stares and i waste myself and rip out my hair,
how much do i got to scream to give someone a damn sign to please help me?!!?!?!


(chourus)----vvvvv

You or the world can't save me,
no hope for love or humanity,
the memories will fade, as i accumulate rage.
The past is the past, today is today,
Hold on to the one you love, cause you could end up like me,
a broken soul, who lost controll over everything and everyone he ever known..
I'm tired, broken down, and alone... This is the story of my life..


(verse3)---vvvvvv

I Struggle to find the one that would lead me on,
been caring about nothing but jail time and so on,
nothing ever seems to get better, just more depressing writing in gloomy weather,
my soul is light as a feather, but my thoughts can carry on forever, how long until
all this ends? I'm tired of barely having friends, im tired of fake girls, fake smiles, and fake feelings,
when all i would ever do is show you my true feelings, how can the world have such an effect on the young?
It looks like the ending is soon to come....



(chourus)----vvvvv

You or the world can't save me,
no hope for love or humanity,
the memories will fade, as i accumulate rage.
The past is the past, today is today,
Hold on to the one you love, cause you could end up like me,
a broken soul, who lost controll over everything and everyone he ever known..
I'm tired, broken down, and alone... This is the story of my life..


(verse4)---vvvvvvvv

I Dream that everything would be back to normal,
way back when i was 4 and liked school, when i loved my family and my friends too,
when i would have the biggest smile you would ever know, but that's all the past,
the rest of the world can kiss my ass, i wonder what i do from here? A Road i walk alone,
will only introduce fear, i can't stress how much i love you all, but it's these lonely moment's where i want to end it all,
the story of my life, i haven't told it all....


(chourus)----vvvvv

You or the world can't save me,
no hope for love or humanity,
the memories will fade, as i accumulate rage.
The past is the past, today is today,
Hold on to the one you love, cause you could end up like me,
a broken soul, who lost controll over everything and everyone he ever known..
I'm tired, broken down, and alone... This is the story of my life..

[Hate]

I like it.

It's deep & has nice flow. I think it'd be nice if it were to be sung slowly & in delicate voice.

Personally I would add some subliminal messages in it, rather than just writing your story so down to the point - I think it'd come off more clever, also after you may discover double meanings which is cool. Or perhaps just add more linguistic techniques?

When I've written things like this, to the main world I've had a lot of negative feedback because it's so depressing and people hate on it because they think i'm trying to get attention & all i do is feel sorry for myself. (which all I was trying to do was express my feelings through poetry). In my writing now I try to make it so the emotional people out there understand it, but the people who are oblivious to mental states of mind don't understand the connotations.

Your song, your choice. Just think you could tweak it a little and make it even better.

[Proaxxs-peter]

Hm... Well done. You have really exclusive thinking. Steady so, mate!