is it wrong not to love your own family?

[ItsxThatx1Kidx]

Traditionally and ideally, a family is meant to be filled with love and adoration. Love, an intense feeling of deep affection,(Yes I googled the definition). However, as I look at my family I can't help but notice how empty I feel. For example, my baby brother no longer brings a sense of euphoria I usually get when I hold him. Or when a relative says "I love you", I always respond back with a "I love you too" without a second thought on whether that statement is true or not.
 
I can't help but wonder if I'm turning into a sociopath, or if most people feel the same way I do. Of course, I've felt love before. My late father, at one point my grandmothers, and so on. But now, when I look at them I feel nothing. Just emptiness being filled by thoughts. The same goes for my friends I suppose. It's just so easy to be wrapped up in other's joy, but when alone I'm like a rock. A lying, possibly sociopathic rock.

I guess the point of this post is to receive help(?). I put a question mark because I honestly do not know what type of help I need.

[tina]

Hi, it sounds to me like your depressed but why? Did I read it right when you said your dad past away? It could have something to do with a feeling your needing and not getting from anyone or it could be that for some reason your self esteem has dropped . There's so many reasons why you could be feeling the way you are right now . maybe you miss your dad, maybe you need a companion, I'm not really sure without understanding your whole situation. I wouldn't shut people out. Especially your family. You got to look at things in a better light. A little positivity goes a long way! If its something someone has done to you then you must open up and talk to someone. Whatever the case maybe, sometimes we lose track of ourselves and we allow negative thoughts to cloud our minds. You got to wake up and say to yourself, today IS a beautiful day and I will make the most of it to be as happy as I can be BECAUSE I deserve it!! Every time you post I will get an alert on my phone. I am here anytime you want to talk. I'll do my best to give you the best advice I can give you!!

[ItsxThatx1Kidx]

Hi, it sounds to me like your depressed but why? Did I read it right when you said your dad past away?  It could have something to do with a feeling your needing and not getting from anyone or it could be that for some reason your self esteem has dropped . There's so many reasons why you could be feeling the way you are right now . maybe you miss your dad, maybe you need a companion, I'm not really sure without understanding your whole situation. I wouldn't shut people out. Especially your family. You got to look at things in a better light. A little positivity goes a long way! If its something someone has done to you then you must open up and talk to someone. Whatever the case maybe, sometimes we lose track of ourselves and we allow negative thoughts to cloud our minds. You got to wake up and say to yourself, today IS a beautiful day and I will make the most of it to be as happy as I can be BECAUSE I deserve it!! Every time you post I will get an alert on my phone. I am here anytime you want to talk. I'll do my best to give you the best advice I can give you!!

Hi tina, thanks a lot for responding, it means a lot. As for my father, yes you are correct. Although, I'm sure it's not depression. I've had 4 years of that nightmare and it's finally over. I suppose an easier way to describe how I'm feeling would be neutral. I rarely get excited unless someone I'm close to is....I kind of sound like an emotional succubus or; at least, I tend hide my lack of emotion by mimicking another...and now I sound like a robot.
 I'll admit your inspirational message about being happy did bring a smile on my face. My best friend tells me that often. As for shutting people out, I've done enough of that when my father passed away. I only did that because I relied solely on him for all my needs. No one else really mattered, family included. I've always been the black sheep of the family. Our ideas have never lined up and they've always treated me how they wanted me to be: a mindless sheep who blindly follows ignorance. After a big fight broke out between my grandma and cousin, I've simply fallen out of love with my family. Even to the ones who weren't directly involved with the outbreak.

[tina]

I had to think about what I was going to say before I typed it to you. I'm thinking maybe you need to separate yourself from everyone for a little bit ( if its possible) sounds like you need a break! You gotta go out and make some positive things happen for yourself. You should never do what others want you to do cause your the one who has to live your life and you should be happy! At the end of the day , you make choices you can live with and don't worry about how anyone else feels about them. I always do what makes me be able to wake up every day and smile regardless if my choices makes others mad or if it makes them not want to talk to me. I'm going to be happy because that's what I choose for myself. I deserve it. You deserve! Life is short! Why not be happy ! Let this world know your here

[ItsxThatx1Kidx]

I had to think about what I was going to say before I typed it to you. I'm thinking maybe you need to separate yourself from everyone for a little bit ( if its possible) sounds like you need a break! You gotta go out and make some positive things happen for yourself. You should never do what others want you to do cause your the one who has to live your life and you should be happy! At the end of the day , you make choices you can live with and don't worry about how anyone else feels about them. I always do what makes me be able to wake up every day and smile regardless if my choices makes others mad or if it makes them not want to talk to me. I'm going to be happy because that's what I choose for myself. I deserve it. You deserve! Life is short! Why not be happy ! Let this world know your here

Inspirational and sweet, thanks. I'll keep that at heart as best as I can.

[Mimi]

Hey, I'm sorry you're going through a hard time at the moment. If you'd like to get emotional support from volunteer trained active listeners you can check out 7 Cups here http://www.7cups.com/12647476 I hope you get the support you need and deserve.

[wasim s]

I believe that like and love is two totally different animals. We love a lot of things in our life. Love is an easy word to toss around and used more out of habit than a real emotional commitment. We loved our dinner, we loved a movie, we loved the sunset and on and on. But like takes a bit more thought. The word “love” is as over used as “sorry.”
Instead of telling folks that I truly care about “ok, love ya, good bye,” I often say “I like you a lot, good bye.” Sometimes their response is one of puzzlement…"you like me, but don’t love me?”
So, let’s go back to the family and if we like them. For many people, expectations of others are the biggest let down and most difficult concept to get past and/or over. I’m not talking about a big expectation that would be so out of character for the individual it’s not fair to even hope for an expectation met.