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The last thing I remembered before I died.... was my head laying on a cloud.
The coolness on my face and the refreshing air blowing at me.

Then I was on the other side.
I awoke, motionless. I could see. There was a light.
My vision blurred, my eyes moved as if under a spell.
Then I felt it. The pressure. The tingling in my spine as something reached out to touch me. When it did the pain was unbearable.
I reacted, at least I thought I did. There was no movement. It was quiet.
Yet I could still feel the pressure and touching.
Then I heard them, the drums, in my head they pounded, oh so rhythmic.
Panic was starting to set in. The cloud was a cloud no more.
It was my enemy. It brought me to this place. I grabbed it with all I could muster.
It wasn't enough whatever had gotten a hold of me in this strange place was not letting go so easily.
I wanted to cry. I wanted it to end. The drums got louder as my breath quickened.
I was starting to suffocate. I couldn't breathe.

Then I woke up. Heart pounding. Sweaty and confused. Somewhat out of breath. My bed was a mess. I checked the time.

Then I died again.

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Hope you guys enjoyed it. It may seem a little confusing to those who haven't experienced this. I have been experiencing it a lot lately and had to write about it. It's how I feel when it happens sometimes. Sometimes it's worse.

Constructive criticism appreciated.

No offense or anything but it seems like you were raped? ;)

(03-26-2011, 08:04 PM)Nick Wrote: [ -> ]No offense or anything but it seems like you were raped? ;)

Yeah raped by my own mind.

Be serious here man.

This was really good. I hope to see more work from you in the near future.

Thanks. What did it make you feel like reading that?

I've heard of the effects of sleep paralysis and hypnagogic hallucinations. Very creative writing here. I'm sure you could elaborate a lot on the subject being discussed here since it's still not fully understood even in today's society.

(03-26-2011, 08:48 PM)Infinity Wrote: [ -> ]I've heard of the effects of sleep paralysis and hypnagogic hallucinations. Very creative writing here. I'm sure you could elaborate a lot on the subject being discussed here since it's still not fully understood even in today's society.

I could elaborate on it but the thing is I don't even fully understand it. I wish I could though.

(03-26-2011, 08:52 PM)SleepyTroll Wrote: [ -> ]I could elaborate on it but the thing is I don't even fully understand it. I wish I could though.

That could be your style of insightful writing then. Write from an insightful and questioning perspective. Lots of great pieces in literature do this to expand on the readers way of thinking.