New song

[Psychosis]

It has been about 2 months since i wrote a song so i decided i better start writing again so here we go this is not a final version it will be edited. remeber i play metal so use that as a base.

Punishment

OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Fire raining from the sky
my mind dissolving (sp?)
Whats going on?
whats happening?

This worlds done
Ever Changed
Folding in
Burning up

You idiots!
You did this!
Its your fault!
Now you will be punished!

Fire raining from the sky
My mind dissolving
Whats going on
whats happening

You Fools!
What you done?
You will be punished
The ground gissolving beneath you

Fall to your death!
This is a symbol
this is your punishment
Fall into the flames

This worlds done
Ever Changed
Folding in
Burning up

The water steaming
Heating up
Burning for eternity
This is your punishment

You idiots!
You did this!
What now?
Whatr you gonna do?

Your death awaits you !

Tell me what you think constructive critsism (sp?) welcome but dont just tell me its bad give me a reason.

[Nemmyy]

This has the potential to be a pretty sweet metal song depending on your style. You should record it

[Psychosis]

I'm mostly death-core / metal-core. If I had a drummer I would record I only growl / scream also so I can't do the few singing parts

[Nemmyy]

I'm mostly death-core / metal-core. If I had a drummer I would record I only growl / scream also so I can't do the few singing parts

deathcore/metalcore ftw
I'm not a huge fan of growling just because it's retarded and isn't very musical, like chocolate rain on youtube, although he's pretty cool

[Psychosis]

HA, if you do growls right then alot of people actually like them but you probably have heard people who do it wrong in which case they are retarded sounding and you cant understand them one bit.