So yeah

[BigBadSoft]

Probably isn't the best place to get help, but my girlfriend of 5 years left me yesterday.

She said was tired of being 'committed' to one person, and I don't know what to do.

My uncle tried to commit suicide yesterday by hanging himself, but the rope broke.

Which is the only reason I haven't done anything, because everyone in my family is going through enough emotional type stuff already, why add to it?

I've always had a problem with huffing kitchen supplies, but tonight, I feel like I almost OD'd, which I don't want to, but I was just so depressed I couldn't help myself, and I'm here alone, so nobody was here to call the ambulance or anything, but I'm just trying to decide what to do with life.

I've tried the only thing I know how to do, which is huff, but it's obviously not getting me anywhere just making it worse, and I want to go to a therapist or something, but I'm scared of letting my parents know what's going on.

I've been in my room for the past two days, because of what happened, sleeping, or trying to sleep, until my parents left, then I immediately go into the kitchen or the bathroom, and spray, febreeze or any other kind of spray into a plastic bag, and just breath out of the bag.

then I'll do it until I pass out, then again, then I usually stop, but tonight I kept going, like I didn't care what would happen.

I'm just really going through a lot, and I could use someone to tell me everything is going to be ok, and that I need to stop doing things like this.

I've never really asked for much, and I just thought I'd post this :/