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Well, where do I start.

At night, I get severe anxiety due to the fact that school is coming up, I cannot sleep and I can't breathe, I get 3 hours of sleep every night. The beginning of last year I moved 1,000 miles away from all of my friends and everybody I knew to a new area. I stopped going to a public high school after one month and began homeschooling due to me not making any friends and i'm to anti-social to get out there, I also get severe anxiety from social gatherings which is why I couldn't find friends.

I have never said any of those things to anybody, but my life is just so boring and I have no friends, i've never had a girlfriend, i'm not really attractive, and I don't have anything to live for to be honest. I have thought about suicide, however i'll never do it. I think about scenarios where I do commit suicide and people mourn for me, however if I ever did die, the only people who would notice that I was gone would be my parents.

My problems may not seem big, but I hate my life right now. I have no friends, no social life, I sit at home and watch TV all day and play video games because I have nothing better to do. Does anybody have any advice that could help make things a little bit easier for me in life?
I am literally the same as you and have been for about 2 years now. I've gotten used to it and genuinely don't care that I sit home all the time doing nothing.
Hey dudes, I feel for you and it isn't easy. Life right now can be very difficult for everyone let alone fellas at your age and in your situation. School can be the worst place at times and peer group pressure, social pressures, parents and the media all contribute to this. Other students can also be complete asswipes! So don’t ever think you’re alone, but a lot of people just can’t cope full stop to give you support.

Here’s a little info to take or leave. Finding some sort of identity (of your own) which gives you meaning and ultimately purpose is what you have to strive for. This is what gives you the motivation to get up and do stuff because you want to, as opposed to because you have to. If you “have to” do stuff you just end up not doing it at all and life becomes not only a challenge, but meaningless. In your example, how are you defining yourself? By not having a girlfriend, thinking you’re not attractive enough, too anti-social, and not good enough at school? You have to change the small talk between yourself to acknowledge these thoughts or feelings, but start developing a plan in your head about what you want to change and then (preferably on paper, pc) set some specific goals that you revisit or get help with. By doing this (and I can expand later) you can help change your small talk. It will also give you some purpose in life and the motivation to participate. In turn you will feel better about yourself as we are programmed to go the negative route. Chicks will always be a focus but activity (action) builds self-confidence and this is what attracts girls (along with a bloke with some purpose) regardless of looks.
(07-20-2013, 10:44 PM)neddles1997 Wrote: [ -> ]Hey dudes, I feel for you and it isn't easy. Life right now can be very difficult for everyone let alone fellas at your age and in your situation. School can be the worst place at times and peer group pressure, social pressures, parents and the media all contribute to this. Other students can also be complete asswipes! So don’t ever think you’re alone, but a lot of people just can’t cope full stop to give you support.

Here’s a little info to take or leave. Finding some sort of identity (of your own) which gives you meaning and ultimately purpose is what you have to strive for. This is what gives you the motivation to get up and do stuff because you want to, as opposed to because you have to. If you “have to” do stuff you just end up not doing it at all and life becomes not only a challenge, but meaningless. In your example, how are you defining yourself? By not having a girlfriend, thinking you’re not attractive enough, too anti-social, and not good enough at school? You have to change the small talk between yourself to acknowledge these thoughts or feelings, but start developing a plan in your head about what you want to change and then (preferably on paper, pc) set some specific goals that you revisit or get help with. By doing this (and I can expand later) you can help change your small talk. It will also give you some purpose in life and the motivation to participate. In turn you will feel better about yourself as we are programmed to go the negative route. Chicks will always be a focus but activity (action) builds self-confidence and this is what attracts girls (along with a bloke with some purpose) regardless of looks.
I don't have the confidence to make changes like that :/
Have you considered talking to a Councillor? I tried one but she didn't do much, but it might work for you.
I understand, but confidence is a mindset to. Life is a lot about being an actor for different situations. It's how most of us can function and do all the things we do without taking everything on personally. Otherwise we would all get caught up over-analyzing and being way too critical on ourselves. Confidence only really comes from doing or action, which equals experience and which you have to force initially (most people do).
You need to get out more. Experience the finer things in life such as time with friends, partying, eating out, any real source of entertainment is a plus. You have depression, and while getting out more frequently would be a huge step in the right direction.. it wouldn't be a problem solver. You need to see a psychologist.
I looked into it, and I think I might have schizophrenia. I can't talk to my parents about it, I don't know why, but I won't get myself to so I can't see professional help.

I went to http://www.schizophrenia.com/earlysigns.htm# and I have the following symptoms from the site:

--A blank, vacant facial expression. An inability to smile or express emotion through the face is so characteristic of the disease that it was given the name of affective flattening or a blunt affect.
--Staring, while in deep thought, with infrequent blinking.
--Clumsy, inexact motor skills
--Sleep disturbances- insomnia or excessive sleeping
--An awkward gait (how you walk)
--Unusual gestures or postures
--Movement is slowed down- staying in bed (in extreme cases, catatonia)
--The inability to experience joy or pleasure from activities (called anhedonia)
--Sometimes feeling nothing at all
--Appearing desireless- seeking nothing, wanting nothing
--Feeling indifferent to important events
--Feeling detached from your own body (depersonalization)
--Hypersensitivity to criticism, insults, or hurt feelings
--Sudden irritability, anger, hostility, suspiciousness, resentment
--Depression- feeling discouraged and hopeless about the future
--Low motivation, energy, and little or no enthusiasm
--Suicidal thoughts or suicidal ideation (Kind of? As mentioned in the OP)
--Severe Anxiety
--Dropping out of activities and life in general
--Inability to form or keep relationships
--Social isolation- few close friends if any. Little interaction outside of immediate family.
--Increased withdrawal, spending most of the days alone.
--Becoming lost in thoughts and not wanting to be disturbed with human contact
--Neglect in self-care- i.e. hygiene, clothing, or appearance
--Finding it difficult to deal with stressful situations
--Lack of goal-directed behavior. Not being able to engage in purposeful activity
--Functional impairment in interpersonal relationships, work, education, or self-care
--Inappropriate responses- laughing or smiling when talking of a sad event, making irrational statements.
--Intense and excessive preoccupation with religion or spirituality
--Drug or alcohol abuse



When i'm alone, I feel like I can hear screaming but I can't make out what is being screamed, it's weird, I just feel screams in my head on top of all the symptoms. After reading that i'm really scared about what this could mean.
(08-04-2013, 01:35 AM)Nitemare Wrote: [ -> ]I looked into it, and I think I might have schizophrenia. I can't talk to my parents about it, I don't know why, but I won't get myself to so I can't see professional help.

I went to http://www.schizophrenia.com/earlysigns.htm# and I have the following symptoms from the site:

--A blank, vacant facial expression. An inability to smile or express emotion through the face is so characteristic of the disease that it was given the name of affective flattening or a blunt affect.
--Staring, while in deep thought, with infrequent blinking.
--Clumsy, inexact motor skills
--Sleep disturbances- insomnia or excessive sleeping
--An awkward gait (how you walk)
--Unusual gestures or postures
--Movement is slowed down- staying in bed (in extreme cases, catatonia)
--The inability to experience joy or pleasure from activities (called anhedonia)
--Sometimes feeling nothing at all
--Appearing desireless- seeking nothing, wanting nothing
--Feeling indifferent to important events
--Feeling detached from your own body (depersonalization)
--Hypersensitivity to criticism, insults, or hurt feelings
--Sudden irritability, anger, hostility, suspiciousness, resentment
--Depression- feeling discouraged and hopeless about the future
--Low motivation, energy, and little or no enthusiasm
--Suicidal thoughts or suicidal ideation (Kind of? As mentioned in the OP)
--Severe Anxiety
--Dropping out of activities and life in general
--Inability to form or keep relationships
--Social isolation- few close friends if any. Little interaction outside of immediate family.
--Increased withdrawal, spending most of the days alone.
--Becoming lost in thoughts and not wanting to be disturbed with human contact
--Neglect in self-care- i.e. hygiene, clothing, or appearance
--Finding it difficult to deal with stressful situations
--Lack of goal-directed behavior. Not being able to engage in purposeful activity
--Functional impairment in interpersonal relationships, work, education, or self-care
--Inappropriate responses- laughing or smiling when talking of a sad event, making irrational statements.
--Intense and excessive preoccupation with religion or spirituality
--Drug or alcohol abuse



When i'm alone, I feel like I can hear screaming but I can't make out what is being screamed, it's weird, I just feel screams in my head on top of all the symptoms. After reading that i'm really scared about what this could mean.

Alot of people with depression and anxiety experience those exact symptoms. It's rather normal for someone with depression to experience them HOWEVER if you're hearing voices or screaming in your head then there's a very good chance you could have schizophrenia. If that's the case you need to consult a psychologist.

Best of luck, keep us updated.