So around August of last year I met an Australian named Zach from my town and we fell in love a short while after that, we lasted around 2 months before breaking up and I was left crying in my own arms because no one else I trusted that much to see me cry. Now let me point this out I got in 3 relationships after that but they didn't last anywhere near as long, me and Zach got over it and got back together and we loved more than before, it was a great relationship. We kissed, had sex, and other stuff that lovers would do, but he kept coming back to my place drunk as hell and it made me cry everytime he did but I couldn't give him up until the 5th night in a row he did it I exploded and told him we were breaking up, he went to rehab "for me" but I got together with my other ex, Spencer, and I couldn't risk getting so hurt again and he came home, found out about us, got pissed, told me off, made fun of my dead dad several times and I told him to go drink and get depressed again. Well, today I ran into him, crying my eyes out for him and wrapped my arms around him and kept yelling "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" to him and he just pushed me away and said "What do you want?" I told him that I just wanted one last hug and he said I need to earn it if I'm getting one because he doesn't trust me at all anymore. Now let me say I've always had trust issues and this guy was the only one I've ever trusted other than my dad who has passed like I said. Anyway he gave me my hug and chance but said if I fudged up again it was over...So what do I do?
TL;DR
I got with a guy, we fell in love, we broke up because he drank, he went to rehab, I got with another guy because I didn't want to get hurt, he came back and told me off, left me alone and basically hates me now.
From what I can read, it is he that is in the wrong, not yourself...
With the least disrespect, i'm oblidged to say that zach isn't worth your time. Anyone who loves you or cares about you would allow you to do what you need to be happy. He is upset because he expected to come back to someone and unfortunatley its not you. Your current boyfriend will help you feel better. thats what hes here for
I agree with Breshie. You are not in the wrong. If he really cared about you, he'd have stopped drinking bcuz he saw that it upset you a lot and would have valued you over the alcohol.
Quote:. We kissed, had sex, and other stuff that lovers would do, but he kept coming back to my place drunk as hell and it made me cry everytime he did but I couldn't give him up until the 5th night in a row he did it I exploded and told him we were breaking up
It was his fault that he was getting drunk and shouting at you, but you being his girlfriend should have told him to avoid drinking or at least he should've controlled it.
You said you wanted a break up was a good decision.
Quote:he went to rehab "for me" but I got together with my other ex, Spencer, and I couldn't risk getting so hurt again
It's your mistake here, Zach went to Rehab for you, but you cheated him and you got together with Spencer, that's just sad. You shouldn't have done that.
Quote:he came home, found out about us, got pissed, told me off, made fun of my dead dad several times .
He made fun of your dad? You should have slapped him, that's so immature of him.
Well here are my questions
Do you really love him?
Do you think he's good enough for you?
Would "you" cheat on him again?
I guess i have to take the opposite position here.
There was no mention of Zach going out and seeing other people.
Sure he has or had a drink problem. But it appears you have relationship issues.
Switching guys as you said you did.
Me personally i dont like this quality one bit in a woman and if i was zach i would have done worse and told you to f uck off.
Sorry but thats my opinion.
5 days in a row drinking and you go off? WOW lucky your not my wife.
The fact he offered himself to rehab? Holy crap you should be kissing his shoes for that.
This is after you having 3 other partners. Man i would not have given you the time of day.
Sorry but i see you as the problem here not Zach.
Well said DAMINIK, i agree 100%, , just want to add one last sentence ! KELSE, you need to reshape your entire existence here, get real, look toward your future, stop playing around with your's and other's emotions ! And most of all, you are mating an alcoholic ?! look, take it from someone who has been there , Alcoholics are alcoholics for LIFE, rehab no rehab, they will stay like that for life and as a doctor told me once about my own situation :" alcoholic ppl are no different from drug addicts,you stand between them and their primary need, you become the N1 enemy" !! and he was right.
Good luck KELSE.