My mom has been stuck taking care of my grandmother that has alzheimers for over a year now and its very exhausting for her, not mention it stresses everyone else out at my home (sisters, etc.) My gradmother is essentially braindead and shits on the floor, has to be fed, etc. And my mom is always moody from taking care of her which in turn makes everyone in my household mad. Sometimes I find myself blaming my uncle that hung (killed) himself because he was living with my grandmother before she became ill. Then when he passed, the event made her ill and she was forced to move in with us. When i start thinking like that, I feel really shitty that the though even crossed my mind but its really getting to the point where my grandmother's presence is exhausting for all of us and we just dont have the ressources to put her away at the moment.
Oh man, this is my worst fear. I would not know what to do with myself if my grandmother got Alzheimer's. I really feel for you man, even the thought of it scares me half to death! Just try to keep strong for your family, and instead of getting mad with your mother for being stressed, try offering to help her. It may not be nice, but it would relieve a lot of pressure off of your mother and therefore your family too! You could even try to work something out where your whole family could pitch in.
I hate to suggest this, but, have you looked into care homes? They will take care of her and you can visit regularly.
Keep your head up, and focus on the good things in life man. Wish you the best!
If you/your family can't afford to get her the proper care she needs, I would suggest looking into government assistance, or liquidating your grandmothers assets. I'm sure this would help the situation temporarily, or at least until you can figure something else out. Good luck!
I am going through a similar situation with my Grandmother and the stress that comes along with trying to care for her. I can tell you that there is Government assistance out there that can help with caring for your Grandmother, so this is definitely something your family should look into ASAP. As much as we want to be the ones to care for our loved ones, we need professional help to keep us from going insane!
The second thing you should do is maybe speak to your mom and get the rest of the family involved. Maybe you can all take turns (as stated above) so your mom won't feel like the burden is on her shoulders alone. This may help with her mood, which in turn, will help with the mood in the household! She might be feeling alone and depressed. Watching her mom go through this illness doesn't make it any better.
I hope this helps a little. It's a tough situation to be in and I feel awful for anyone who has to go through it. Best of luck to you.