Support Forums

Full Version: Male Female Friendship Question?
You're currently viewing a stripped down version of our content. View the full version with proper formatting.
Basically I'm seeking advice, input and opinions on this.
Any help would be great.


I was friends with this girl for about 3 years. At one point I was actually sexually attracted to her. After being close friends with her for about 2 years, I made my feelings clear to her. I didn't get a clear response from her so i just left it alone. A year after that I decided that I could not continue being friends with her for a few reasons. She treated me like her average female friend and would want to stay on the phone for hours and gossiping about her other friends. She would keep referring to me as her best friend while I did not consider her that way. I also still had emotional feelings for her so I felt like it was interfering with my sex life. Every time I would get intimate with any woman, I would think of this female friend of mine. So I made a decision to cut our friendship. When I did, I also told her that she treats me like a female friend and that I'm tiered of listening to all the gossip and drama.

Its been a year now since we last talked. She decided to reach out to me through my family. She contacted a family member and asked if there is any way I would talk to her again and that she misses her best friend.

At this point I'm lost. I thought this was all behind me now and now she is trying to reach out to me.

Should I try to rebuild our friendship?
All my friends are telling me that she likes me and that its taking her a long time to realize it.
I think that she gets off to stringing me along.

Why is she trying to contact me?

The thing is we did have a great time hanging out and just doing dumb stuff and she would give me advise here and there. But at the same time she would never allow me to try and hook up with any of her friends.

I'm just so confused and have a million things going through my mind at this point.

As I said any help would be great.

Additional Info:
There has never been anything between us other than hugs and a kiss on the cheek.
I'm 27 and she is 23.
We are both heterosexual.

Thank you.
(02-06-2012, 08:21 AM)Alexander_john Wrote: [ -> ]Me and this girl met on new years. We are both 16. I asked her out on the 15th, and we have been video chatting about 4 hours a day EVERY day. I am starting to lose interest. Please help, I like her a lot and she is the prettiest of all of the girls I have dated. Why am I losing interest? Because we talk too much? How do I tell her we need to slow down?

Don't hijack other people's threads, create your own thread, this guy was asking for help, and unless you are this person, which isn't good anyway, because it confirms that you've created multiple accounts here, then you shouldn't be trying to change the topic for what someone else posts. You've done that a few times already so far.

Review the rules, and have some common courtesy.

Either way, the ages don't match, so I don't think you are the OP.
Honestly, I'd give her another chance. You can never know, maybe wait a few months or something to find out.
I agree with Vince, give her another chance. But since you know you want more than friendship, i'd make that clear from the getgo. if she's not interested, you can cut it off and finally commit to moving on. If she is, then you can see where it takes you.
(01-30-2012, 07:12 PM)Average_Guy Wrote: [ -> ]Why is she trying to contact me?

Well, it is possible that she realized that she does care about you, and she wants to see if things would work out. But OTOH, it is also possible that she just misses what she considers her "best friend". Women can feel friendship towards men but it's hard for men to feel just friendship towards women.

I would suggest that you do not re-establish contact with her, unless you are prepared for just a friendship. If she doesn't want anything more than friendship, do not feel mad at her. But it seems to me that there is probably a woman out there who would love to be with you, and she will appreciate you from the start. Good luck.

Guest

Hey I'm the original poster Average_Guy.... forgot the password lol

Just wanted to thank you all for all your input folks.

ackstua I have a feeling you might be right about what you said.... She just wants back the person she felt closest to and felt was her best friend.

I decided to take the first steps to respond to her. Will see where this goes.

Again thanks for all the input.
Give it another shot. If you find she has no genuine interest in you, leave it alone.